Three questions. Five minutes.How to tell whether a spiritual offer is any good before you go.

With food, most people ask carefully. Whether there's lactose in it, whether there are nuts. Before a ritual almost nobody asks anything. Yet a ritual goes deeper than a lunch. These three questions need no background and no research. Two you ask the person leading. One you ask yourself.

By Andy DittrichAs of 17 September 20266 minutes

The test, three questions

1. For the leader: "What does healing mean to you?"
2. For the leader: "What happens if I want to stop halfway?"
3. For you: "How do I want to feel when I come out?"

A sentence is an answer. Ten minutes aren't. Whoever answers simple questions at length and beautifully is dodging.

Why three questions show more than any research.

Online reviews tell you how others felt. A website tells you how someone wants to be seen. Neither tells you anything about what happens to you when you sit in that room.

These three questions don't ask for opinions. They ask about craft. The first shows you what the person intends at all. The second, whether you're still allowed to decide once you're inside. The third, whether you have a direction of your own. And without the third, the first two won't help you much.

Whoever doesn't know where they want to go arrives where someone else wanted to go.

The three questions, one by one.

Ask them calmly, without reproach, on the phone or by email, before you sign up. Whoever takes them as an attack has already given the first answer.

AskThree questions. Five minutes.
  • "What does healing mean to you?"
  • "What happens if I want to stop halfway?"
And one for youHow do I want to feel when I come out?

A sentence is an answer. Ten minutes aren't.

01

"What does healing mean to you?"

The question sounds harmless and is the hardest of all. It forces one sentence about what the person intends with you. Pay less attention to the words than to the length. Whoever knows what they're doing doesn't need ten minutes for it.

02

"What happens if I want to stop halfway?"

This question checks who the room belongs to. A good answer names a door, a way out, and a person who comes with you if you want. Your body decides. Not the group, and not the person with the drum.

03

"How do I want to feel when I come out?"

The third you ask yourself, and it's the only one you can cheat on. One word, in five seconds, and you have to be able to point with your finger to where in the body it sits. If it takes longer, your head answered. It makes a hundred answers a day. Then you don't go yet.

2
Questions for the leader
1
Question for yourself
5
seconds for the third

How you recognise an answer.

On the left, what sounds like an answer and isn't. On the right, what is one. None of the lines on the left is made up. They were all said like that.

No answer
An answer
"Healing is a process of reconnecting with your true essence ..." (and then eight more minutes)
"That afterwards you can do something you couldn't do before."
"That doesn't happen with me." Or: "That's exactly when it really begins."
"You get up and walk out. I'll come with you if you want."
"I see something around you. We need to look at that."
"You decide. I tell you what I see, you keep what's true."
"As many as come. The circle sorts it out."
"Twelve. I don't take more."
"I did the weekend and since then everything is different."
"It took me five years, and I stopped in between."
"Best book the next date straight away, then the opening stays."
"If it's on your mind, call me in a week, not tomorrow."

The second point on the right is the most important. Whoever places a diagnosis into your reality builds on it. Without your yes. Keep the image, give back the interpretation.

What exactly isn't.

This isn't a list against healers, circles and drums. Most people who offer something mean it seriously, and many can do something. The problem almost never sits with the ritual.

It sits where someone goes in without a direction of their own and hopes it'll turn out fine. Rituals aren't dangerous. They work. Whoever goes in without a line comes out changed. And then someone else has decided the direction.

Rituals work. The question is in which direction.

So a dodging answer doesn't mean the person isn't serious. It means: not today. And if you're already inside and it tips, you walk out. Without explaining. The choice doesn't stop when the ritual starts.

Rituals work. The question is in which direction.

Common questions.

How do I recognise dubious spiritual offers?
With three questions. Two for the person leading, one for you. First: what does healing mean to you? Second: what happens if I want to stop halfway? Third, for you: how do I want to feel when I come back out? A good answer is short and concrete. Whoever answers at length and beautifully is dodging.
Why exactly these three questions?
Because they don't ask for opinions but about craft. The first shows what the person intends at all. The second shows whether you're still allowed to decide once inside. The third shows whether you have a direction of your own. Without the third, the first two don't help much.
What's a good answer to "What does healing mean to you?"
One sentence that names something concrete and describes your role in it. For example: "That afterwards you can do something you couldn't do before." Bad is anything that takes ten minutes, names no person, or promises you a healing someone else performs on you.
What's a good answer to "What happens if I want to stop?"
One that names a door. "You get up and walk out, someone comes with you if you want." Bad is: "That doesn't happen", "That's exactly when it really begins", or a smile instead of an answer. Your body decides, not the group.
Isn't it rude to ask like that?
No. With food everyone asks whether there's lactose in it, and nobody finds that rude. A ritual goes deeper than a lunch. Whoever takes a calm question as an attack has already given the first answer.
Does a bad answer mean the person isn't serious?
Not necessarily. Many mean it seriously and just never thought about it. The problem rarely sits with the ritual and almost always with the missing direction. A dodging answer only means: don't go today.
What do I do if I'm already inside and it tips?
You walk out. You don't have to explain it to anyone, and you owe nobody a reason. The choice doesn't stop when the ritual starts.
Where do these questions come from?
From many years as a student of indigenous shamans, and from around two thousand people I've guided through rituals. They're set out in full in the third book of the series, "RITUALE. Wer holt dich zurück?" (RITUALS. Who brings you back?). And the five questions for any leader are on the page "Look closely. Ask."

Who writes this.

Andy Dittrich
Andy Dittrich

He has guided around two thousand people through rituals, safely in and safely back out. He learned for many years as a student of indigenous shamans in North America and Mongolia and of a teacher in the Moroccan desert. The three questions on this page are set out in full in the third book of the series.

My intention with these pages: I share my knowledge so you can find the difference yourself. Between shamanic bullshit and something truly special.

Before you go

The questions are one thing.Your own line is the other.

In mentoring you practise exactly that for six months: knowing where you are, seeing what is there, and holding your own direction. Even when someone else in the room has the drum.

See the mentoring

Goes with it.

Shamanic?Look closely. Ask. Five questions for any leader. Secret knowledgeIf it's secret, why is it being shared? Shamanic trainingFour paths. No oversight. How to recognise the serious ones. Fire ritualLetting go without a direction is a slip of paper.